| Misunderstood | ||||
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Tuesday, September 21, 2004 I sat,watching him walk by. He never seemed to notice, He didn't seem to care. But that was nothing new. Not more then 2 yrs I've sacrificed, covered up, fought for him. but he still doesn't know how much pain, suffering and hardship i've gone through for him. He used to make me happy, somehow, and always brightened up my day. He made me feel whole, complete, Perfect. In my own way. I thought i had the same effect on him too, turned out that i could have been wrong. He used me, Abused me, Made me feel sick just thinking of it. But, I suppose i did let him take advantage of me. I played along, pretending and refusing to know. but then I realised, got to my senses. I refused, rejected, and that's good i suppose. But why do i still feel this way. He used me, taught me. why do i still tear myself to sleep every night? hurt myself for a useless asshole like him. It was my heart screaming in pain, for the mere thought of him not knowing how i feel. He was there to confort. to heal my wounds of a tourmented heart. But now there was no one- who listened. Then I forgave and forgot. still even with the scars, the scars of one searching for an answer to all. and peace was made, between the lord and I. Now he's worse off. We don't talk. All my 'friends' are now the one's he talks laugh's with etc. and all i get are the memories of how we were before. He's a retard. as for all i ment to him, was nothing. and all he ment to me, was everything in the world. But yet, It pains. And i still feel as though he's a part of me. a part of me that will never come back. but now it seems as though i've found that piece, that's possibly just as amazing and wonderful. and it seems that i'm the one this time who had him hurt. But i'll never make that same mistake again. I swear. But why you ask? Why did i put up with everything he did? It's because, he was the first, who made me feel Love.
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about Name: Kathy Anne lim Nick'z: Katz
Age: 14
gender:female School: kcs
Roman catholic Olps
Hobbies:Anything to do with paper, black pens and imagination
Celtic's bleed
Stickley
archives 03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004 links
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credits original layout w4rnawarni : listen to the music designed by w4rnawarni @ blogskins |
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